This is a spin off of yesterday's "where did my brain go". I was thinking today ( Yes, I actually had the ability to think today for a slight minute), and there are a lot of things that I DO know. Now, I'm not refering to education, profession, etc. I'm talking about with my kids/husband/family. Maybe an intuition thing. What I have come to realize is that I really do have a 6th sense. That 6th sense is the ability to "catch your ass out".
I can identify who farted and from which room at any given time. Just by the little toot sound. I can identify who left the dooky in the toilet and why they didn't flush, and even one better, whether or not that person washed their hands after words. I can identify ANY dropped object in ANY room in the house, and the person that dropped it. I can identify if you are REALLY asleep. I can identify a boo boo cry from any where in the world. I can tell if you're lying anytime, so don't try pulling a fast one. I can tell where any given kid is in the yard at any given time (this is partly due to their big ass mouths). I can tell if you're getting sick, even if you don't know. I KNOW when you don't finish all of your dinner, think I'm a dumbass and feed the piece to the dog, the plants, my garbage, my toilet, your little brothers plate. I especially know when you've spilled something and tried to pick it up before I found out.
I can keep going , but I know it'll just get boring for you guys. But see, I'm not so demented after all..